Metanoia
by Shadow Silver Fang
Summary: Because Kagome saved the world and all she had to show for it was a broken heart, a job as an assistant, and a star shaped scar on her abdomen. Kagome ships off into the past to fulfill one last destiny. KagSess


_10:35pm_

Kagome held her champagne flute carefully in one hand, and smiled graciously as the host of the party. He kissed her cheek, she kissed his, and then he moved on to greet the next guest. She had only been working for him for six months, but he had taken a special liking to her. She could never bring herself to be upset with his informality, no matter who shot her disapproving looks. He was too sweet, to kind; a pure soul in a business that was filled with greed and lust, and lord knew what else. She watched him move through the crowd with grace, and poise, a man well practiced when it came to gala events. She didn't think she would ever manage such grace.

"Kagome!" a cheery voice called, and her eyes pulled slowly away from her boss to alight on an old friend.

"Hojou," she said, smiling and letting him give her a loose hug. "I didn't know you'd be here!"

"I am interning with Kaibu Industries," he said, "I was sent in place of my employer."

She grinned, "Kaibu? Congrats, Hojou!"

She hadn't seen him in over a year, not since he graduated from university and began his long search for a job in his field. She had graduated the semester after him, but a job had been waiting for her with Matsumoto Inc., a job as the personal assistant to the companies head honcho. She only signed on to work for a year, but with more than half of that year passed, she hoped she would be allowed to renew her contract. Working under Sento Tanaka had opened many doors for her, had allowed her to make friends with influential people. More importantly, it kept her busy enough to forget all the heart ache that her jaunt in the past had left her with. Five years, and still her heart ached when she thought of her time hunting for Naraku.

The understanding that it couldn't have ended any other way than it had, caused the ache to deepen. The fates had cursed her from the beginning, and she'd been helpless to their plan.

"How are you enjoying your time with Mr Tanaka?" he asked, drawing her out of her thoughts.

"Oh, it's great!" she said, sipping at her champagne. "The hours suck sometimes, but I couldn't ask for better people to work with!"

_Except, maybe, my friends from the past_, the thought brought a sharp stab of pain, and Hojou must have sensed it.

He frowned and reached out to touch her cheek. "Are you okay, Kagome? You seem a little... distracted."

She waved off his concern with a forced smile and made an excuse to get away, wishing him a half hearted 'Happy New Year' as she went. He reminded her of those days, and it made it hard to talk to him. It was unfair to him, she knew, but she couldn't help it.

It hurt to remember.

_10:46pm_

"Kagome!" Sento Tanaka called, and she smiled brightly at him as he maneuver the crowd to get to her. "Are you ready to usher in the new year?"

"More than!" she said smiling, clinking their champagne flutes together before taking a sip. "Do you have any resolutions, Mr. Tanaka?"

"Yes," he said, grinning. He leaned in towards her ear so she could hear him better over the crowd, "The one at the top of my list is to get you to stop calling me Mr Tanaka. My name is Sento, and I insist you use it."

She laughed, "Alright, sir. Sento it is."

He smiled broadly at her, then excused himself to mingle with the rest of the crowd. He was a social butterfly, and Kagome couldn't ever keep up with him, though she had a feeling he wouldn't object if she tried. She wandered through the crowd slowly, taking her time to get from where she'd been at the center, to the less dense fringe of the crowd. A few faces she passed were familiar, but most were strangers. Some introduced themselves, knowing her though she didn't know them. She smiled to them each and shook hands, but she never lingered. No matter how man parties she attended, she still wasn't good with crowds.

She navigated her way out of the party, into a darker lit hallway that led into Mr Tanaka's house. She knew she shouldn't wander in without permission, but she was much more comfortable in the solitude of the hallway, than in the fray of the party. She understood the importance of keeping up appearances, for Sento Tanaka, but wouldn't it be more fun to go to someone else's party, than hold his own? Not so easy to escape from, but easier to leave behind once midnight had come and past.

She passed a few servants in the hall as she walked, but they didn't pay her any mind, going about their duties as if they were the only ones there. Ignoring everyone probably helped them remain unnoticed. People noticed people who noticed them first. She wandered deeper and deeper into the labyrinth of Mr Tanaka's house, knowing that eventually she would need to find her way back to the party, but not having any inclination to do so.

_11:02pm _

Kagome found her way into a small garden, a place set in the center of Mr Tanaka's home. It was lit only by the moon, a bare slice of light that only served to cast deep shadows and make it difficult to see. Despite being dark, it was very welcoming, as though it had been waiting for her. She set her champagne flute down on a bench as she passed it, wandering further into the garden. It couldn't possibly be a large garden, not when it was a courtyard in the middle of the house.

It seemed to stretch on forever.

She followed a gravel path, slipping through the rose bushes and the trees, making her way towards what she assumed would be the center. She eventually rounded a bush and found herself at the edge of a large pond.

She gazed into, and her reflection gazed back, looking too much like Kikyou and making her shiver in a way that had nothing to do with the extremely low temperature. A koi burst through the water and destroyed mirror image, making her jump backwards in surprise. She jumped backwards into somebody, and their hands grasped her shoulders to help steady her. She tensed, her breath freezing in her lungs.

"Kagome?"

Instant relaxation. It was Mr Tanaka. She let out her breath and managed a weak laugh. "Mr Tan-Sento. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wander."

He released her and she turned to find him smiling, "It's alright. I saw you leave the party and wanted to make sure you were okay."

She smiled in response, "I'm alright. It was just a little hot in there. I thought some air might be nice."

He grinned and agreed, leading her to a bench where they sat down beside each other. He was being kind, and sweet, but she felt sad and quiet.

"Sento," she ventured, "Did you always know you would be doing what you do?"

He tilted his head, slightly confused, but answered anyway, "Not exactly this, but I always knew I would be involved in a business of some sort. Why?"

She looked out at the roses and admired the way the moonlight reflected off the rippling pond. "A few years ago, if you told me I would be in this business, I would have thought you were crazy."

He grinned, "Had big plans?"

She shook her head, "No. Not at all. With everything that happened to me in middle school, I thought I had no future."

His grin dropped away, and he suddenly looked very serious. "You were ill often, Kagome, but even so you were highly intelligent and look how far you've come! I see nothing but greatness in your future."

She choked back a laugh that threatened to be a sob. He wouldn't ever understand, fully, how she felt. She hadn't had big plans, no, but she had thought that things would be different. She was a priestess, and she felt that inside of her, deeply engrained in her soul. But being a priestess didn't pay, and her paychecks were helping Souta study abroad during his final year of high school. If she had followed her heart and become a priestess on a shrine, then he would be studying in a public school, waiting to send in applications for universities.

She had saved the world, and all she had to show for it was a broken heart, a job as someone's secretary, and a star shaped scar on her abdomen. The Fates were cruel.

_11:35pm_

Mr Tanaka had made small talk with her for nearly twenty before she told him to go back to his party. He had obeyed, but not before giving her a light peck on the cheek and an incredibly sincere wish that he see her when the clock struck twelve. She fully intended on being there, but for the time being she was enjoying the cold solitude of a winter garden. She stood and moved towards the pond again, seeing steam rising off of it in thin wisps that quickly disappeared. She touched the surface with her index finger and smiled. It was heated, kept warm for the koi.

She was again staring at her reflection, the reflection of a perfect stranger. She reached up to comb her fingers through her hair, and her vision blurred. A tear ran down her cheek and hit the water, making it ripple, disturbing her reflection. A few more joined it, and she returned to her bench, staring up at the moon and wishing that her life had just a bit more to it.

_11:55pm_

The pond was entrancing, and though her eyes were red and puffy from tears, she found herself unable to look away from her reflection.

She heard a whisper of cloth behind her and turned, smiling, "Sento?"

Her smile fell away. "Who are you?"

The man was a mass of darkness, a human shaped shadow that smiled at her with gleaming white teeth. He was standing ten feet away, but as she stared he took a step closer. She moved a step back, and her calf brushed the wall around the pond.

"What are you doing?" she demanded, and her hands began to glow pink as her power flared up in her defensively. "Stay back, buddy."

He paused at the sight of her power, and she blinked. He was inches away in the time it took for her eyelids to fall shut and snap back open.

"Are you a demon?" she asked. "Are you here to kill me?"

He didn't feel like a demon, but particularly strong ones had a way of masking their energy. He didn't answer he question verbally, but she hadn't expected him to. Instead he reached out to press the palm of his right hand to her chest. She felt heat rising in her cheeks, and opened her mouth to give him a piece of her mind, but he pushed, and she fell.

The water felt especially warm when she fell into it, back first, eyes staring widely at nothing. She couldn't see beyond the surface of the water, and she couldn't move. The water was getting warmer, and she was moving deeper into it. It hadn't seemed so deep when she was looking in, but now it was bottomless. She felt something catch, and her heart soared as pink and blue light surrounded her, pulling her into it's embrace and dragging her easily through time.

She was suddenly completely dry as she moved through time, and she could breathe. It felt the same as it had all those years ago, like she'd never stopped going back. She was mildly disappointed when the ride stopped, but as she stared up the well into the star filled sky of the Feudal Era, she couldn't feel anything but overwhelming joy. She kicked off her high heels and sought out a hold in the damp wall of the well.

It was harder, climbing out, than it had been so many years ago. But she supposed it didn't get any easier when you stopped doing it regularly. By the time she fell over the side of the well, into the dewy grass, she was sweating. The air was warm, and clean, and perfectly the way she remembered it. But she was confused. It should have been cold, the dew should have turned to frost. Instead, it was warm nearly to the point of unpleasantness. She lay sprawled out across the grass, the dew soaking through her clothes, her eyes tracing the stars in the familiar sky.

A warm breeze made the grass sway across the hill, making it look like a living thing, and she laughed, tears gathering in the corners of her eyes as her as it became crying. She lay there for many long minutes, weeping her joy to the world around her, until something sparked. It was a demon, but not. She sat up slowly, cautious, eyes scanning the field. Something hunched near the tree line, and she felt eyes watching her, the attention crawling over her skin like ants.

Very slowly she reached up to wipe her tears away, her eyes focused on the lump at the edge of the forest. If it wanted to kill her, it was certainly taking its time about it. It make a jerky movement towards her, and she scrambled back, grasping the well for support as she raised herself into a sitting position.

"Are you the one I have waited for?" it asked, it's voice gravelly and old, slowly, jerkily, making its way closer. "Are you the one who has come to aid us?"

"W-who are you?" Kagome asked, a touch of fear in her voice. "I don't understand. Aid you with what?"

"To help us fight the demon," the thing said, "The demon that brings death and sickness upon all human kind. I called for the chosen one, the one for whom time allows rule breaking. He promised he would send her to me."

"He? The man from the party?" Kagome asked, "Who was he?"

"My brother, my lover, and my child," the thing said, and Kagome suddenly had a feeling that the thing was a woman of some sort. "He promised to send her. Is she you?"

"I don't know," Kagome said, "I don't know!"

"She must be you," the woman said, and her jerky movements had brought her close enough that Kagome could see her.

She looked human, but a thick black cloak obscured most of her body from sight, made her blend into the darkness much the same as the man had. Her body was hunched, and her face marked with deep wrinkles and sagging skin. Her eyes were the clearest, palest blue that Kagome had ever seen.

"What do you want from me?" Kagome asked, trying to shrink down against the well.

"If the demon lord cannot be made to feel love and compassion for living things, then all will be lost!" the woman said, one gnarled hand reaching out to touch Kagome chest, "You must make him feel! Melt his icy heart, or we are all doomed! Even the Gods could not save us!"

Kagome was finding it hard to breathe, "I don't understand!"

The woman was getting closer, "You will! You must!"

Kagome closed her eyes as the old woman came in even closer, her heart pounding in her throat, as though struggling to break free of her body.

"Kagome."

That voice! So familiar, and yet changed. Warmer than it had been in un-death. Kagome opened her eyes and the old woman was gone. She looked around her, and there, at the bottom of the hill was the one person she had never planned on seeing.

"Kikyou."

The priestess looked almost the same as she had on that last day, the same as when Kagome had closed her eyes and bid the past farewell. She looked the same, and yet different. She had aged, wrinkles showing at the corners of her eyes, and on her forehead. But she was still young, but just a bit older. Kikyou looked so different in life, than in death. Her skin was flushed, pink from blood flowing beneath it, and her eyes shone with emotion. She was wearing the clothing that she always had, the red hakama of the miko, with her hair tied back tidily by a red length of cloth.

She could see questions burning in the elder miko's eyes, but she could also see the hesitation in her eyes. Was Kikyou afraid of her? The last memory she had of her was as she was embraced by the newly human Inuyasha. In the wake of her wish, Kagome had been easily forgotten by the couple as they reconciled.

Finally, Kikyou spoke. "Why are you here, Kagome?"

Kagome struggled to stand as Kikyou began moving closer.

"I had thought your return to your own time was permanent," the miko continued, "Inuyasha could no longer pass through the well, and I could no longer feel the pull of our twin souls seeking one another."

Kagome found that her legs were weak, and after struggling to remain standing for a moment she sank down to sit on the lip of the well. "I thought it was too. I tried to come back so many times... but it never worked."

"How did you come back now?" Kikyou pressed, stopping a few feet away and regarding Kagome cautiously.

The younger miko closed her eyes, "A man. He pushed me into a pond. I don't think he was human. The magic caught me, and pulled me back."

Kikyou remained silent, as though waiting, but when Kagome did not continue, she sighed. "I'm sorry, Kagome. It would seem that the Fates are not finished with you yet."

Kagome opened her eyes, and looked up into the face of her predecessor. Kikyou's face was filled with compassion.

"How is everyone?" she ventured. "Inuyasha, Shippo?"

"They are well," the elder said, smiling. "But not here. They have gone to exterminate a demon horde, with Sango and Miroku. I was left to defend the village."

Kagome nodded, "An old woman was here," she said, eyeing Kikyou, "She said that I would come to understand. That I am needed here."

Kikyou's brow wrinkled in confusion, "I do not understand."

Kagome sighed, "Me either. She said the world was doomed, beyond help of the gods, if I could not make someone feel love and compassion towards the living."

Kikyou suddenly looked... cautious. "Did she say who?"

"She didn't give me a name," Kagome hedged, "She just said that I will understand."

"I see," Kikyou muttered. "Perhaps we should move to the village. You are not dressed for this time, and it would be best if no one spied you in such... revealing attire."

She reached out for Kagome's hand, and the younger girl took it after only a second's hesitation. It was warm, and alive, and comforting.

"I have extra hakama and haori," she continued as they moved down the hill, Kagome's bare feet sliding on the damp grass. "You are welcome to them."

--

**A/N**

Hi there! So, this is my first official jaunt into the realm of KagSess, and I am really looking forward to it. As I write this it is going on 8am, and I have yet to go to sleep. I was attacked viciously by a beetle of some sort that smelled strongly, though not unpleasantly, and I fear I shall never sleep again. The thing was huge, I tells ya, HUGE! Smelled really good though. Perfume-y, but not. o.O

But yeah. Feedback, please! It would be appreciated and wonderful. Any spelling errors, please point them out so I can edit.


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